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Post #24683 by mykidsneedmetoo on September 4th 2009, 11:59 PM (in topic “Case Law on Parenting arangements at Interim - Post Goode & Goode”)

Case Law on Parenting arangements at Interim - Post Goode & Goode:

Update and hopefully source of encouragement to any Dads out there seeking more time with their kids

I got equal time with my kids in Jan 2009 :thumbs:

this was after 2 years of dispute, with my ex….

solicitors were involved but we never actually went to court, although we have got court orders they were drawn up by solicitors and they were approved by both sides

i forget how many meditations i went to with her before this point it could have been between 15- 20 but the thing is i just hung in there and bit by bit proved i was just as good a parent as she was

it took me two years to finally get this, when we first separated ex offered me one weekend per fortnight,then finally her solicitor must have advised her to agree to 50- 50 shared care when i said enough and i threatened to take it to court

now 9 months into this new arrangement kids are happy as larry they spend plenty of time with Mum and Dad and we get on pretty well, help each other out when we can

hang in there it does work out in the end, as hard as it is focus on the end result of being with your children, ignore urges to attack your ex and concentrate on your kids

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Post #1967 by mykidsneedmetoo on September 25th 2007, 7:44 AM (in topic “Case Law on Parenting arangements at Interim - Post Goode & Goode”)

Case Law on Parenting arangements at Interim - Post Goode & Goode:

cheers Agog,

i'll check that forum out, i really was just interested to see if there was any relevant cases

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Post #1965 by mykidsneedmetoo on September 24th 2007, 10:41 PM (in topic “Case Law on Parenting arangements at Interim - Post Goode & Goode”)

Case Law on Parenting arangements at Interim - Post Goode & Goode:

thanks Agog,

i will be looking around the whole site,
but this is where it is hard for me to express how ripped off i feel….. you wrote


"If a dispute between parents arises after a Parenting Plan has been prepared, the Court is entitled to look at the Parenting Plan as a reflection of the parties intention in guiding the Court as to what Order is appropriate".

In other words if you made an agreement what reasons can you offer the Court as to why it should be changed. Whilst the Rice and Asplund (change of circumstances) argument is technically to argue against existing orders the same principles hold true if the matter goes to Court.

i made that agreement under enormous pressure (that is the initial parenting plan ) because prior to that i had nothing……….. i had no time with my kids…… i took what i could get……she had kicked me out of the family home and would not let me have the children for any overnight contact

i took what i could get through the mediation process with both hands…….. at no stage did either of us say that was to be the parenting plan for the rest of the kids lives, it felt like i was on trial at that mediation, she made many allegations about me that were completely untrue and i had to sit there and beg to see my own children

the agreement was wrong in the beginning…. but it wasn't as wrong as me never having the kids for overnight contact….. it was wrong that i and the children had to go through that …….now 12 months on i should not still be on trial ……. her lies should no longer carry any weight and the well being of the children should be that they can have equal time with both their mother and father

that is why the agreement should be changed…….surely the courts could see that

yes she works part time, i have tailored my work to be at home now, 

 

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Post #1963 by mykidsneedmetoo on September 24th 2007, 7:08 PM (in topic “Case Law on Parenting arangements at Interim - Post Goode & Goode”)

Case Law on Parenting arangements at Interim - Post Goode & Goode:

no worries Agog,

no we don't have existing orders, but we do have a parenting plan in place which was drawn up through FRC mediation

( the FRC mediation was pretty good for me i must admit but i did go to extraordinary levels to make sure i was prepared before the meetings, in the course of about 4 mediations over a period of approx 6 8 months i went from a situation where i had no overnight contact to a parenting plan that is 50/50 during school holidays and 9 and 5 nights contact during school time yes of course she gets the 9 nights )

i have always wanted the 50 /50 care but she made up rubbish about me being violent and a bad father etc so initially the kids didn't stay with me at all……. i had to prove myself as i was guilty on her say so :dry:

this parenting plan has been in place and functioning well for over 12 months so i am hoping to build upon it

it is just the youngest 4 is starting school next year and i would love for the kids to stay with me one more night, initially she had said this would happen when the youngest starts school but now is going back on her word "surprise surprise"

the other child is 7, despite everything i get on pretty well with their mum ( biting your tongue in this situation is hard but wise ) it just frustrates the hell out of me that she thinks that her way is the only way,

she will no longer agree to having mediation with me as i think she now know she will lose out

Am i represented ?? yes sure i have had a solicitor who was helpful with the property settlement but i am not keen to shell out any more cash if it is not worth it as my mortgage is already the size of Siberia, but i would take it too court if i believed i had a strong case

at this point in time i would like to be able to show her a couple of recent rulings hoping that will be enough to keep us out of court
but from what i can gather its a matter of how the old judge is feeling on the day as to how these new laws are interepted and i am not real keen to spend up thousands if i things aren't going to go the way i hope i also don't want to jeopardize what i already have

man what i am asking for is soooo practical, the kids love staying with me…we have a ball …… i work from home so i am always available if they need me and i live closer to their school than she does

thanks for your help guys… you really are providing an important resource


 

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Post #1961 by mykidsneedmetoo on September 24th 2007, 6:15 PM (in topic “Case Law on Parenting arangements at Interim - Post Goode & Goode”)

Case Law on Parenting arangements at Interim - Post Goode & Goode:

thanks for this information,

i have just joined site and it seems like a really good resource…..any other cases which you can recommend may be relevant to a Dad seeking 50 / 50 time with his kids

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