I am still waiting for the ex to attend group session with Family Relationships Aust so we can go to mediation. I went back in feb and have been awaiting her to do the group session. I want to get a consent order inplace asap- as recommended by members here in my last post.
Financial settlement is on hold pending new CSA payments. I am awaiting the new rates to approach bank again to get a loan to pay her out.
My current CSA payments mean bank won't give me loan big enough to satisfy her.(In cyberspace no one can hear you scream!)
Your collective wisdom/experience is again sought.
My ex has demanded I start to pay rent to her for living in the family home. She moved out on her own volition last May to be with her new partner. She rents a house and says it is unfair I pay a relatively small mortgage whilst she has to pay full rent where she is.
Actually her defacto pays half the rent or most likely all.
I have refused, as I have paid all the mortgage, rates,insurance and repairs since she left and will continue to do so until I either buy her out or sell.
Thank you for all the replies. Much appreciated. Some food for thought.
Mike T. - No we only have verbal agreement but kids have been week on/week off from day 1 and I have paid the CSA amount religiously via chq every fortnight.We also go 50/50 on all sports/school costs etc. I have chq records of all these too.
After 10 months or so I am hoping that a precedence has been set.
I originally was just going to sell the house, Split proceeds and move on but my sons have told me a number of times that they want to stay in the house if possible. Hence my offers to ex over last few months.
I paid off the house about 5 years ago and now only have a new smaller mortgage for a pool that she wanted and new car for her.
I received an Easter phone call from her and she is now wanting me to pay rent to her because I pay such a small mortgage and she pays over 3 times that figure in rental. Actually probably only double as she is getting rent assistance. I did some investigating on this and saw cases where women in my position (In family home) have only had to maintain mortgage/rates repairs etc, so I am following that line.
My ex and I separated in May last year. She had just graduated as a high school teacher after 12 years at home with kids and Uni study. She got a contract for 6 months but quit after 2 months saying it was too hard. She then began relief teaching which paid quite well (around $280 per day) Again, too hard. Her excuse is that it takes her away from quality time with the boys. Says was busy all week-ends getting class work ready.
She now works part time in an office (2 - 3 days a week).
I am currently trying to pay her out to keep the family home (I live in it) but with the amount of cash she wants I cannot secure a bank loan of that magnitude due to my current CSA payment commitments. I currently pay her over $200 per week as her CSA earnings are currently $0.00 as she only earned Mar- Jun in last tax year. The difference is only around $50K on cash I offered. I offered her extra 90K Super to compensate but refused as she just wants cash.
My question is about her capacity to earn as this affects my ability to get a loan to pay her out. A 1'st years High School teacher's wage is $49K and her CSA currently sits at $0 earned. I believe she will be lucky to earn $25K in this office job.
The ex told me she has rang CSA and found out when the new laws come in July my payments will reduce to $107 per week and I can afford to pay her out. It still will be a struggle as rising Interest rates will hit again as will higher market value. I did the new calculator and that shows she is estimating around $30K earnings. When I put in $49K my CSA drops to $53 per week. I believe I can then get loan and own the house with CSA @ $53.00 per week.
I have read the rules and am worried she will beat me on the unwilling to work criteria. She quit so soon on becoming a teacher can she say that is not her career path and office work is?
As for caring responsibilities - the boys are all in primary school and when she taught (briefly) she had no problems either picking them up or they went to after school care for perhaps 1/2 an hour.
Does anyone know whether it is worth trying to lodge a capacity to earn or am I just wasting my time?