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Post #5362 by Shafeeq on February 17th 2008, 12:28 AM (in topic “False allegations, a possible end to this chapter?”)

False allegations, a possible end to this chapter?:

Thanks, I am new to this, and was under the aprehension that false allegations can stall the proceedings for years. Good to know that changes are afoot.

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Post #5202 by Shafeeq on February 14th 2008, 11:26 PM (in topic “Interim Contact Order”)

Interim Contact Order:

Thanks for that. The public forum has been a great help.

I will apply to join the SRL_Resources area and proceed from there.

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Post #5187 by Shafeeq on February 14th 2008, 3:09 PM (in topic “Interim Contact Order”)

Interim Contact Order:

Re: Rice and Asplund, this seems to be the key to it all.

What are the change of circumstance that warrant that I should resume contact?

And how would this benefit my child, rather than preserving the status quo?

I get quite negative when I think that there is a strong possibility that this threshold test is nearly impossible to overcome! What has changed?

I am completely able to cope with having my son in my life. I have the strength and energy to challenge and disprove that I may not be a fit father. I am willing to further enhance my parenting skills, such that my son gets the best possible outcome when he is with me … that is not only TV, etc, but good quality time.

The fact that my son may desperately want to see me seems irrelevant. Or that all attempts to convince my ex that I should resume contact have been met with empty promises and a "we'll see" attitude.

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Post #5185 by Shafeeq on February 14th 2008, 2:52 PM (in topic “Interim Contact Order”)

Interim Contact Order:

Thanks D4E and all.

My child will be 10 in June (son). I am seeing a family law specialists this arvo (3:30 + GST) for the hour!

It seems that to get an existing order amended (which was by consent) is like climbing Mount Everest.

At the time I signed the orders, I was under considerable stress, having not seen my son for three and a half months after having normal contact for two years!

I was threatened with an AVO and coerced by emotional pleadings to my family, by my ex (by the way I have no bitterness toward her or doubt her parenting abilities). But this is the first time I intend to take the matter to proceedings. Even then I will write to her and attempt contact that way with a full parenting plan.

Why I think it's in my son's best interest to resume contact, I have full family support now, my health issues are under control, I no longer take anti-depressant medication, I have the time flexibility, have set up a room for him, the contact will be gradual, under supervision, at first, if she wants, until (I hope) that my son and I resume a "normal" father son relationship, as much as we can given the circumstances.

We'll keep you posted after the meeting with the solicitor!

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Post #5155 by Shafeeq on February 13th 2008, 2:54 PM (in topic “Interim Contact Order”)

Interim Contact Order:

Thanks for the feedback, i contacted the FRC where I went previously and they suggested a second attempt at mediation with me developing a parenting plan could be advisable, or should I just go striaght to the courts.

The ideas she formed about me last time she stopped contact were greatly influenced by her brother was was a mate until we had a falling out, and in fact he made some the allegations in relation to the AVO, which were very grave and unproven. They did not even attend court nor provide any evidence to the police. the matter was dismissed. In her (clouded) opinion I am a bad influence on my son and she does not wish to discuss the issues or provide any proof.

By the way the FRC has a two month waiting period, is patience really a virtue in these matters?

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Post #5119 by Shafeeq on February 13th 2008, 12:36 AM (in topic “Interim Contact Order”)

Interim Contact Order: re:replies

Thank you for your replies, it has been a great help, I am attending a dids meeting and intend to join the slr-resources group and have been to alawyer although thier expertise is quite limited to be honest, the idea of "re-applying" for contact seems very foreign to them, do i need to go to family law(contact order) specialist.

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Post #5109 by Shafeeq on February 13th 2008, 12:03 AM (in topic “Interim Contact Order”)

Interim Contact Order: reply to more information

I'll address the mediation issue first.

When contact was stopped abruptly 14 months ago (no explanation given), I decided to go down the mediation path.

I went to the FRC and did a parenting course. All contact in relation to mediation was ignored. Instead a spurious AVO was slapped on me which was dismissed in court. After the harrowing experience of the AVO, and coupled with my own health issues, I did not pursue the matter further. In fact I acceded to signing a consent order which took out all details in relation to existing contact.

My son is nearly 10. I relied on my sisters as mediators for a change of heart and while promises have been made, nothing has been forthcoming, except for one phone call!

I have now regained my health to the extent where I can start this.

I don't mind developing a full parenting plan for my son and submitting this as a basis of mediation, but I feel that I will be knocked back.

Thanks for the previous reply!

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Post #5108 by Shafeeq on February 12th 2008, 11:52 PM (in topic “The menace of the "Black Dog"”)

The menace of the "Black Dog"

The issues in family law can shake a human being to his/her core and take them to the depths of despair.

The 'd' word, I am sure is something most have experienced when going through this. There are however lots of strategies to overcome and I have found that one of the best is to do a little a day and to look ahead to the day when resolution occurs.

Remember inaction while at times completely justifiable will never change the status quo!

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Post #5102 by Shafeeq on February 12th 2008, 11:18 PM (in topic “False allegations, a possible end to this chapter?”)

False allegations, a possible end to this chapter?

Are the courts really putting the child's interest first these days?

And are courts also putting aside the multitude of false allegations etc. to look at what's best for the child?

Is this miraculous? Or an urban myth?

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Post #5097 by Shafeeq on February 12th 2008, 11:01 PM (in topic “Interim Contact Order”)

Interim Contact Order: Reply to no contact

Consent orders are in place but nothing is mentioned in them about contact, just that she has sole responsibility for his day to day care.

I have been divorced since 2004. I had contact before, by mutual agreement. I tried the FRC and mediation, with no response. I relied on my family members as a conduit to resume contact.

All other matters relating to my divorce, financial, property etc. are settled.

Do I just throw in the towel? Or is there a case for me to pursue?

I have freed myself up for at least three hours a day, for the sake of my son!

Thanks again.

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