Donate Child Support Calculator
Skip navigation

Ex Attempting to relocate

Hi There,

My Ex wife is currently filing for an urgent rolcation order to allow her and my 2 children aged 10 and 7 to move 1 hour 40 mins away to reside with her new partner of 2 years.


# We have been separated since 2009 and have both repartnered. I have been living with my new partner for 3 years and my Ex has never lived with hers due to the distance.

# My Ex told the children they would be relocating prior to informing me or having any orders sort. I found out through my childs friend at school.

# My Ex has restricted the nights I have my children to 5 nights a fortnight. I have sent numerous emails stating that I wish to have them more however she believes I am not entitled to have them. I understand it is my right to collect the children from school and have them however I do not want to place the children under any stress. There are no current orders in place.

# My Ex sort out employment with her current employer and has commenced this position. However, due to the employee having an office where we currently reside she is working from there. I believe my Ex thought she would be able to relocate as she had employment. I further believe that this indicates she intends to move with or without the children as in a sense she is putting the cart before the horse.

# She recently hired a Nanny. I expressed my disappointed as to why she would not let me and my partner have more access to the children. She ignored this and stated she believed it was reassuring for the children to have a Nanny. I sent emails requesting to have the children more and her collecting them after work. Again she denied this.

# Both my Ex's and mine extended family resides where we currently live. The have regular weekly contact with them.

# I attend all sporting events my children play in both at school and for the town. I also assist with reading groups at their current school.

# My Ex has promised the kids a horse and motorbike if they relocate. My partner and I do not discuss the move with the children as they are extremely anxious and do not want to worry them.

Does anyone have experience in a situation that is similar and can point me in the direction of some relevant court cases to not allow the move and support my wishes for the children to remain where they currently live or reside with me if my Ex wants to relocate. I love my children and believe that my Ex is stripping them of everything in order for her to be happy. I don't believe this move to be in the best interest of my children nor is their any advantages.

Please help….XOXOXOXO
If you have no orders in place at all, then your ex doesn't need to file for anything - there is nothing in place to stop her from moving away.

You need to get some orders in place to formalise your arrangements so that neither party can make unilateral decisions without consulting the other.

I'd be ringing your closest Relationships Centre and organising mediation as a matter of urgency.
Thanks for your reply Malady.

I initiated mediation last November in which failed as she was not open to negotiation. Since then every schools holidays she threatens the move. I assume she has been advised that it's in HER best interests that she gets consent to avoid an return order. She has instructed that that we are going to be served and a court date has been set.

Just trying to find some cases to support my case and for piece of mind as I sincerely believe it's not in the kids best interests.

Thank you for your guidance.
If you've already attended mediation and you have been given a certificate to say it failed, then you can take the initiative here and get your own lawyer to draw up some sensible orders that are in the children's best interests.

Then you can go to Court and lodge an Initiating Application.

To me, it sounds like your ex is trying to bluff you - if she had a court date, surely you would have been served?
Why not take the lead and then you'll know exactly where things are up to because you'll be in the drivers seat. I personally would hate to be sitting waiting for the other shoe to drop the way you are at the moment.

If you are going to self represent rather than hire a lawyer, the SRL group here could offer you some excellent advice on how to proceed, I'm sure.
I am currently out of town so maybe that's why I have not been served? (I had the kids the first week of the NSW school hols) I return next week so I guess I will just have to wait and see. If there is papers served on my return can the court date be post-poned due to the papers nor being served in time, not allowing me time to respond?

It's certainly not healthy nor desirable sitting back and waiting. I have sent plenty of emails stating the advantages of the kids staying far out way the limited, clutching at straw ones to that of moving hoping she would begin to think of the kids before herself however she deflects the reply's, just again stating she wishes to move and will be moving.

I am trying to rearrange finances to fight this as I believe I have a strong case. I thank you again for your guidance and of you could suggest any tips for tackling my situation I am all ears.

Thanks in advance.  
I was lucky to have legal aid for the first two of my five visits to court with my ex and paid for the final three.

What I learned was that the paperwork that I was paying a lawyer to do was simple and I could have done it myself - and saved thousands of dollars in the process.

I would strongly suggest you join the SRL group and talk to them about which pieces of work you can do yourself to save money, and which you should seek professional advice for.

I wish you all the best with it - these things are taxing emotionally and financially, and take a lot of patience and stamina.
1 guest and 0 members have just viewed this.

Recent Tweets