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shared parenting

 I need some guidance I got divorced 4 years ago.We have shared parenting over our 3 children. The  court ordered we do a weekly rotation .My ex and I have had a decent relationship for the kids sake since we have been divorced until recently.  From day one, 4 years ago we did not follow that court order. We would do every othere day with every other weekend. On his days he would drive the kids to me on his way to work and id take care of transportations for all 3 to school doc apt's etc. Well on monday this week he text me stating he wants to go by court order.Now after 4 yeard he will have them for his week and his girlfriend will take them to school i refused at first but he mentioned he would call the cops if I did not obey the court order. My question is after 4 years of him not pulling his weight as being a father can he do this? Also my ex is residential for school purposes only. Which was never followed because kids go to school in my school district with my address and now he wants to yank them out in send them to the school district of his. Is this possible or right what kind of rights do i have as the mother in this?  
Are you in Australia?

It is not unusual for parents who have Court orders to make other arrangements about their children. Sharing and Communication in the Children's interest are encouraged by the Courts. When these arrangements are substantially different from the orders then the Courts encourage parents to lodge Consent orders that reflect the changes. Since Consent Orders are free this is not an onerous task.

In the first instance you should be speaking to an FRC. If there is a return to Court, then the Court will generally look at the arrangements that have actually existed, the term for this is "A practice has developed"

The Police will generally not get involved in this type of dispute if there is no risk of physical or emotional harm to the children.

What kind of rights do you have? NONE. Children have all the rights under the Family Law Act. The Act specifically mentions "the rights of a child" but not of either parent.

Executive Member of SRL-Resources, the Family Law People on this site (look for the Avatars) Be mindful what you post in public areas. 
If your not in Australia any comment fore mentioned may not be applicable.

Agog has suggested the best path to follow with respects to application of the law and this may take time if you pursue this action so it's important to be patient.

My concern is more to do with how your perception can be helped, playing devils advocate so to speak.

In many cases there are life changes that alter and this means that some adjustment may be necessary for both parents to accommodate these changes so it's important to put things into perspective.

The children may have come to an age where they will benefit from week about so it's important to consider the benefits they will achieve by longer stays at each home, you could suggest that initially for a period you do a 3-4 split to give the kids time to adapt, this way you can both see how the kids react to the change ( B.I.C.).

You will also need to check with the school about making sure the children are not de-registered from the school, they have spent their lives being educated there and for consistency they should remain.

Check to make sure that if they are registered there they can not be registered at another school.

It's important to negotiate with the children in mind and not with expectation of personal rights.

If you have both been doing every other day and every other  weekend what makes you say he has not been pulling his weight as a father ????

I think what soccermommy is getting at is that during the father's time with the kids he has still left some of the work to her - eg. instead of dropping them at school he's just dropped them at her house so she has to do the school run. If that's the case I can see why it would be annoying. But isn't his new proposal an improvement? You'll actually have "days off" of all parenting work which it sounds like you haven't previously. I think you'd appreciate this more than you realise yet.
soccermommy said
I need some guidanceI got divorced 4 years ago.We have shared parenting over our 3 children. The court ordered we do a weekly rotation. My ex and I have had a decent relationship for the kids sake since we have been divorced until recently. From day one, 4 years ago we did not follow that court order. We would do every other day with every other weekend.
Just as an observation that is an awful lot of change overs … Very tough on the children I would have thought. One wonders why you did not follow the court orders from day 1.
soccermommy said
On his days he would drive the kids to me on his way to work and id take care of transportations for all 3 to school doc apt's etc. Well on Monday this week he text me stating he wants to go by court order. Now after 4 years he will have them for his week and his girlfriend will take them to school
I don't think you will have much choice other than to adhere to the court orders and failing that you would need to go back and get them amended. Is there any reason this has changed? On the face of it based on what little information supplied it seems the court orders were a more sensible approach.
soccermommy said
I refused at first but he mentioned he would call the cops if I did not obey the court order. My question is after 4 years of him not pulling his weight as being a father can he do this? Also my ex is residential for school purposes only.Which was never followed because kids go to school in my school district with my address and now he wants to yank them out in send them to the school district of his. Is this possible or right what kind of rights do i have as the mother in this?
You are in the United States in Wakeman, Ohio I believe and therefore are obliged to operate within the family laws of the state you are in. I have no direct experience in laws within the USA as I have enough trouble keeping on top of what is going on here in Australia and somewhat in New Zealand. I suggest you will need to work with some of the local web sites or hopefully someone here will have some US based experiences.

Executive Secretary - Shared Parenting Council of Australia
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