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overseas holiday by son what are my legal rights??

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My son is going overseas and has informed me that as he is now 17 I can not stop him as he has a passport and I have no legal right to tell him were he can or can not go

My son is going overseas and has informed me that as he is now 17 I can not stop him as he has a passport and I have no legal right to tell him were he can or can not go.

Apparently as his mother is also going I can not stop him.

I actually am happy for him to go but finding the attitude challenging and wanted to know the accuracy of the statement.

I did object to the little holiday turning into a major adventure and I have no travel plans so if anyone can assist with the actuall legalities that would be great.
Be happy for him and support his adventure, encourage him to stay in touch and give him your blessing.

Don't waist time looking for legal recourse aim for building the relationship and being included.

If you do push this it may well end with his rebellion from you.

best of luck D4E.
I would forget any legal action as it would be a waste of time. Just wish him luck and try and keep in contact; he is nearly an adult. Let him fly the nest.

Executive Member of SRL-Resources, the Family Law People on the site (Look for the Avatars).   Be mindful what you post in the public areas. 
I think you are asking from a legal point of view and this comes down to the what the court orders say. Assuming the orders don't prevent this you could theoretically have the Federal Police arrest him at the airport and stop your wife from taking him from the country. Offcourse after doing this you will probably need the Federal Police to escort him to ever see you again.

So if you want, let him and your ex know that they don't have the right to go but because you care so much for him that you are encouraging the trip.

"When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside can not hurt you"
Domink - The police will not do this especially at his age. The best thing is for the father to leave it well alone; he is in danger of totaly screwing up the situation. The courts will see this as the father having control issues.
As you stated, the father can forget any relationship with the son if he attempts to stop him.

Executive Member of SRL-Resources, the Family Law People on the site (Look for the Avatars).   Be mindful what you post in the public areas. 
I agree Monti.

I was trying to make a point that the only options for ozymark to consider are quite extreme and would severly affect the relationship. I hope this is how it was seen.

"When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside can not hurt you"
Dominik said
I agree Monti.

I was trying to make a point that the only options for ozymark to consider are quite extreme and would severly affect the relationship. I hope this is how it was seen.
 
Yes, that is how I read it. However, not everyone can see that - we need to spell it out to the father, as it is a dangerous course he wants to take.

To the father
You now have two people with plenty of court room experience telling you to forget it - take heed please.

Executive Member of SRL-Resources, the Family Law People on the site (Look for the Avatars).   Be mindful what you post in the public areas. 

17 year olds are meant to be challenging!

ozymark said
My son is going overseas and has informed me that as he is now 17 I can not stop him as he has a passport and I have no legal right to tell him were he can or can not go.

Apparently as his mother is also going I can not stop him.

I actually am happy for him to go but finding the attitude challenging and wanted to know the accuracy of the statement.

I did object to the little holiday turning into a major adventure and I have no travel plans so if anyone can assist with the actual legalities that would be great.
 
17 Year olds are meant to be challenging - they are getting ready to move to full adult hood and total independence.

While the law may hint you could take action to stop him going, in reality any attempt to use the courts would most likely be unsuccessful and further as the previous comment indicate, any attempt to prevent the trip would be likely to do long term damage to your relationship with your son.

Besides, 17 year old thrive on adventure! The trick as a parent is to have taught them to measure risk and to have earned their respect enough to retain influence, said influence must of course be used carefully.

For me - Shared Parenting is a Reality - Maybe it can be for you too!
Hi Ozymark, I think some good words of advice have come your way on this post.

It reminds me of the old saying, 'You can't put an old head on young shoulders' which stems back to the words of advice from E. Drinker in 1794, 'Tis not the way I could wish my children to conclude a year but I shall'.

At 17 your son will be wanting to make his own decisions and testing the waters, while still knowing that you will be there to support him whether his decisions are right or wrong. I remember when I was 17 I told my father that I was old enough to do whatever I wanted, and to prove it joined the Army, while he wasn't jovial about my decision he let me know that if that's what I wanted he would support it. It was that support that got me through 12 weeks of basic training in a Wagga Wagga winter and life's later hurdles as I knew that I could always turn to him in the good and bad times.

While an old head will look at the legalities of your son's comments about going and disapproving of the attitude, the young shoulders will be looking at the excitement that an overseas holiday will bring and looking for Dad to share in that excitement. Don't let the old head and young shoulders collide, let him know your excited about how lucky he is to have an opportunity to go overseas at 17, after all not many 17 year olds get this opportunity, he would be feeling on top of the world.  
Wow lots of advise and thank you.

I was the sole carer for my two boys for a number of years in an unusual court ruling were the mother was granted 4 days a year access.

I had to leave my job as it was overseas to care for them, ironically my older son how has a very similar vocation.

I have no intention of stopping my youngest from going as it is as quite correctly pointed out a fantastic opportunity.

I am reacting to the personal challenge and the lack of any consideration at all so was curious as to the correctness of his opinion

Thank you all for your responses

Mark
I think you'll find the lack of consideration comes from a form of manipulation, the manipulator will expect a certain reaction to draw conflict and use this to gain an emotional bonding to reiterate the old " I told you so " comeback.

Too many of us have these triggers used on a regular basis and I guess thats why so much of the responses suggest " support " and " acceptance ", the manipulator loses control and the victim sees there was no need for all the fuss or concern.

Best of luck with it all D4E  
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