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can she force me to move out of the house?

We've been married for 18 years, have two kids, 9 & 7 y.o and now she wants a divorce, give me something like 20% worth of asset (approx.$130K) and wants me to move out.
Its not enough for 1b.r. flat and her solicitor reduced price of the house (joint ownership) by $100K as her claims that that amount was given by her father from overseas.
I don't want divorce, although being separated under one roof for more than a year its irrelevant i understand.
And being 46y.o with little job security, i can't afford new mortgage or move to shared accommodation.
Can I just stay in my house and disregard any pressure of moving out?
not sure where my other reply went

Get to know the 4 step process.
Factors include:
- initial contribution
- time together
- who is caring for the kids
- who can earn the most and thus reduce the burden on the tax purse.

Kids first, carer second, lawyers third, earner last

Get a legal perspective of all the possibilities.
Prepare for the worst
Act quickly but with consideration
Moving out will weaken you position.
Parenting payment ends when youngest is 8
Given the length of the marriage, then initial contribution will possibly not be considered, as this would have been "absorbed" into the marriage.

Her solicitor will be acting in the "best interest" of his client, so be wary of "ambit" claims. You are certainly welcome to look at property settlement that are available on the net. Check out austlii.edu.au and maybe put "property" in as you key word search. It can make for some interesting bed time reading. Is she able t prove that her father gave $100k, and that could possibly be considered to be absorbed into the marriage as well. Was there a contract as such? Was she looking at paying her father back, was that how things were worded, or was it just to her in order that she could pay her father?

As there are children involved, has a proposal been put forward as to the care /spend time with arrangements for the children, or is she wishing for the settlement first? These are separate issues, although can be seemingly entwined.

And at the moment, parenting payment may very well end at 8 years of age of the youngest, but certainly doesn't take into account if the soon to be ex finds a significant other.

If you haven't done so already, you may wish to consider separating your finances. Living separately under one roof means that you are two independent human beings, without a financial responsibility for each other.
Some magic numbers for your calculations.

8 - when the youngest is 8 years old the carer face the transition form Parenting Payment to Job Start
52 - when the payer has 52 days care per year the payee gets 24 % less CS
128 - when the payer has 128 days care per year the payee looses 35% of the FTB (A and B)

Who is paying for here lawyer ?
If you can get legal aid you could be in a far stronger position than paying for your own.

Your first action should be to get you head around the legal possibilities.
The law has nothing to do with justice, it is a game with a lot of rules, the more rules you know the better your ability to minimise your losses.

While you both own the house she can not force you to move out.
If one of you moves then the other does not have to let them into the house to live again.
This includes one of you spending the night away with a boyfriend ( or girlfriend ).
Where is the line with this?
what about going to work or fishing over night etc?
If she wants you out all she has to do is get a restraining order against you and it's done so sitting tight hoping nothing will happen is not the best thing to do. You should at least try some mediation.

akogan said
We've been married for 18 years, have two kids, 9 & 7 y.o and now she wants a divorce, give me something like 20% worth of asset (approx.$130K) and wants me to move out.
Its not enough for 1b.r. flat and her solicitor reduced price of the house (joint ownership) by $100K as her claims that that amount was given by her father from overseas.
I don't want divorce, although being separated under one roof for more than a year its irrelevant i understand.
And being 46y.o with little job security, i can't afford new mortgage or move to shared accommodation.
Can I just stay in my house and disregard any pressure of moving out?


The length of the marriage is a long one. The offer of only 20% of the assets are low, has the asset pool been decided on by all concerned? - house, super, cars, furniture etc.

I would not move out if you can afford it but be prepared for the 'usual' AVO and possible claim of sexual assault if things get messy.

The monies given by her father comes as a gift - if she claims it is a loan it needs to be backed up by repayments (not recent ones :-) ).

The children are at an age where you will not have the dramas of kids under 4. (McIntosh strikes again!)

If she wants a divorce there is nothing you can do about it.

Have you been to mediation?

How do your education, health and work record compare to the mother's?



Executive Member of SRL-Resources, the Family Law People on the site (Look for the Avatars).   Be mindful what you post in the public areas. 
18 years is a long time, there must have been some fire in there at some stage, is there any way of resolving your issues, gently, and with tenderness?

I'd say after 18 years the fire is long gone and would question if it ever existed in the first place.

If the inheritance has contributed or supported the marriage then it is part of the settlement pool.

You could ask the ex to leave the house and kids?

You could take your 130K and put it away somewhere for the future (into super etc… ) become a student etc…. and live off the system for next ten years so you don't get screwed in the second settlement. At same time find a new wife whose kids have grown up who can support you whilst you become the person you were meant to be and be the best father you can be.

It's not all bad.
Thank you all.
I now know that she expecting her father, 70 y.o. to come to AU for good from Moscow (no other relatieves left), and she wants me out to accomodate her dad. That's additional reason to what she claims long term separation (we haven't slept like husbund and wife for two years due my depression).
He's got his apartment up there worth of $300K and it turns out to be that she also has $50K on her bank account that she didn't put as an asset.
I've just engaged my own lawer to sort the things out, and lawer said that $130K is far less than in this case is fair. Main house $420K plus holiday house $250K = $670K. My share 30% = $200K which is exactly what i want. not $130K. The thing is she wants me to drop my lawer and just follow her instructions, plus she wants a career, so i pick up kids at 3.30 from school - so how can i take a morgage if i uwill become unemployed?
this wed is mediation and she'll push for me being in charge of kids. but i'm also just invited for an interview for $100K p.a. job in city..full time. 8am-6pm..
by the time i get back to Frankston it wil be deep night.

 
She has to give full financial disclosure - that includes ALL bank accounts, shares, apartments in Moscow etc.

Sounds like she is trying to make a case for separation under one roof. She will need evidence, normally from a witness, in an affidavit.

I take it you are both Russian nationals?

Executive Member of SRL-Resources, the Family Law People on the site (Look for the Avatars).   Be mindful what you post in the public areas. 
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