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Children miss out on R&R with dad

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Hello, my partner in is the process of drafting final consent orders via email back and forth with his ex.

He is ofcourse seeking half of all school holidays.

The mother of their children has requested that the father provide signed confirmation of his leave (holidays) or the school holidays are not available to him. She has also requested that if the father does have leave and gets called into work, that visits will cease and the children be returned to her . She will then facilitate the normal dinner and weekend visits.

Does any body find these requests unreasonable.

We have discussed this between ourselves and can`t get our heads around the requests/demands. It`s not as though the children will be palmed off to baby sitters, they will be home with step mum until dad gets home from work. Dad also has flexible work hours and was looking forward to coming home from work and taking the children fishing, shopping, normal family activities, etc. He will ofcourse be able to spend normal holiday time with the children at times but not all holidays as he is only entitled to 4 weeks a year.

The mother can not stand me (step mum) and has made it very obvious via the children, txt, email, verbal. The children adore me as I do them. How can we gently encourage the mother to get over her hatred of step mum and allow the children to have R&R with dad at their other home?

I have contacted the mother via email to try and set up a meeting ( which the mother requested of the father as she would not allow the children in the company of some body she had not met and did not know (hence court action initiated by father)) but was told to butt out of something that has nothing to do with me!

 Any advice or opinions would be greatly appreciated, cheers.
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