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Changing existing FMC Orders

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I have Orders that were made in September 2010. The children (2 boys aged 7 & 15) live with me. The Mother lives interstate. We have shared parental responsibility.
The Mother was having time with the children every school holidays. During their time with her during the 2012-13 Christmas holidays, numerous allegations were made against the Mother. her de facto, sister and girlfriend. The allegations were of a mixture of sexual abuse, drug abuse & mental abuse incidents. Previous incidents during other access periods included physical abuse to the younger child. Reports were made to my local police station and statements were obtained from myself and both children. The complaints were then handed over to the Mothers local police station for investigation. No charges were ever laid even though there were medical reports and photographic evidence.
The Mothers sister has mentioned to me, in the past, that she has a girlfriend who works at that police station. The Mother has also stated the same to me.
However an anonymous report made to Crime Stoppers regarding marijuana cultivation at the Mothers residence was investigated and plants were found.
After threats to myself by the Mothers de-facto, I had Intervention Orders placed against him and the Mother. The Order placed on the Mother was done at the suggestion of a Court worker who observed and heard threats and abuse directed at me in the Court waiting room.
The Intervention Order did not affect the existing FMC Orders. This was very clear on the Intervention Order and was explained to the Mother by the Magistrate.
The Mother has also made outlandish claims against me to my older son, both during access, and on the phone, stating that I am on the Sexual Offenders Register. These accusations have been proven false as I have a current WWC card, security licence and am on various committees at my son's schools that have required police checks. Also my son directly asked a DHS worker who also confirmed that I am not, and have never been, on the Register. I have the phone conversation on tape and the Mother was made aware that she was being taped, but she still made the accusation against me to my son.
The Mother has not had any contact with the boys, or myself, since March 2013. She has changed her address and phone numbers (and possibly email address), but has not notified myself regarding those changes. Her Grand mother has also mentioned to me that the Mother asked her not to give me, or the boys, her new details.
I am aware that the Mother has contacted both of my son's schools and provided her new details but privacy laws prevent the schools from divulging any information to me.
My query is as follows:
Would attempting to have the existing Orders changed from shared to sole parental responsibility, and any further time spent with Mother to be supervised in my state with no overnight access, be a realistic objective?
I would be representing myself as I am on a pension, but am unable to get Legal Aid assistance because I am not the Respondent, am not aboriginal/Torres Strait Islander, am not disabled, etc.
Does self-representation guarantee failure in the Federal Circuit Court?
How can the wishes of my son's (especially the 15 yo) be heard by the Court?
Any advice would be most welcome.
If the mother isn't actually in any contact with you, and you have no way of contacting her… don't you essentially have sole parental responsibility anyway?

I'm not clear on why you think it is necessary to change the current orders?
I wish it was that easy. However my youngest son is changing schools next year but the school requires the Mothers signature on enrolment form because of the Education Department regulations regarding Shared Parental Responsibility.
Also my eldest son has been invited on a Secondary School trip to China next year to compliment his Chinese language studies. I am unable to obtain a passport for him without her signature because of the Shared Parental Responsibility.
Any important medical issues require her involvement as well.
If I had Sole parental responsibility these issues would be non-existant.  :|
I find it fascinating how schools play by their own rules on this stuff. The Education Department here allowed my husbands ex wife to withdraw him and enrol him twice without ever  seeking his input - and he was responsible for half the fees, had regular care and was in regular touch with the schools… still nothing.

I understand your need round the medical and passport issues though - that is a challenge.

I wish you well with it GrumpyUmpy.
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