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I have been forced to move away to progress my career, ex refuses to negotiate fair travel

We have a court order in place (April 2009). Due to the untennable situation in the town I live relating to career progression, I have been forced to move away from my children. I have attempted to negotiate on many occasions, to find myself having to jump through hoops as  my ex's negotiation is to go straight to an organisation. I have recently moved 8 hours away from the children and have communicated by email to my ex that I would like to relax the 2 days per week as I believe this is unworkable, and would like to see the children when I return to their home town. I attempted to do this on one occasion, and yet again was refused additional time to make up for what I had missed out on. I now find myself going through yet another process of mediation. I am still not aware of the reasons as I have not been informed. I was mislead as to the process, understanding that the appointment was the first in a 4 part process, which at the end might still find that, we are unable to negotiate and therefore, will be back in court.   This woman refuses to negotiate. I put forward options which took nearly a month for her to respond, when finally she stated that she refuses to comply with the order nor will she negotiate. I believe that it would be fair to travel to a half-way point. My children are now two years older, and have both said the 2 days per week is not fair and that they want more time with me. My son is the only child to have said what he considers is fair, which is one week on and one week off. I am adamant that I could make this work with support from my ex in travelling to a half way point for collection and drop off. Given the untennable situation is the result of my ex's slander I feel like I will be yet again, disadvantaged and my family will continue to suffer the torment through the refusal by my ex to negotiate terms that are fair and reasonable. I have communicated that as my transfer is effective in July, I will expect that the current court order will stand, with a proposed change to drop off and pick up times. It is clear that my ex will not comply with the order as previously stated.

Does she have to comply with the order? Can she refuse to travel half way for changeover? Will I have to pay her more money and do all the travelling? Would the courts look favourably on a change from 2 days per week (4 days block) to a week per month making up the lost days during school holidays?

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