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AVO Lifted ?

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I was in a relationship with a girl for almost 3 years. Recently we split as I was moving to sydney. We kept constant contact and even detailed still having strong feelings for each other.  I went back to my home town for christmas to see my family and found out she had a new bf and found out the hard way. I was drunk and sent her abusive messages about the new guy.

Later in the night I went to talk to her in a club and being drunk slipped and we knocked heads. I was evicted from the club for head butting her.

I then went to her house and when she got home I was outside her house but a window was smashed. I then went home. Later the police came to my house and arrested me for break and enter with intent to steal and causing damages. But told me nothing would come of the alleged headbutt. Later in the police station I was informed on top of the original charges the assault was also included now and an avo was enforced, by the officor who told me and my parents that nothing would come of the ' headbutt'.

Going through this has been extremely stressful and depressing. I have never been in trouble with the law before, but through all my problems over the last 3 years she has been my only support. Effectively I lost my best friend as well. Emotionally I am not coping with the avo in place, going from constant contact and now completely nothing though the toughest stage of my life. Is there a way to have the avo lifted due to extreme emotional trauma? And before it is brought up I have been seeing a councillor etc. Any help is appreciated thank you.
InDistress said
…. Is there a way to have the avo lifted due to extreme emotional trauma?
Yes but only through a local / Magistrates court hearing. Do various searches on the site for AVO and apprehended violence orders and court hearings and local court.
InDistress said
And before it is brought up I have been seeing a councillor etc..
How is a counsellor going to assist you other than to talk about "Things" that may make you feel somewhat better about yourself ? A counsellor will not get the Police to discontinue the break and enter and the assault charges. I am not sure how you can possibly "Slip" in a  nightclub and head-butt your ex girlfriend who would have said it was an accident had that been the case. (Was she lying on the floor when you fell?) It all seems very strange and if this is for real I would be seeking proper legal advice from someone who has much experience in dealing with AVO and criminal proceedings in your local court. The SRL-R group can make recommendations as to representation.

Executive Secretary - Shared Parenting Council of Australia
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No, I have full legal representation helping me on the matter, helping being a term I use loosely at this point in time.

The drunk headbutt was leaning in to talk to her, as it was loud and I got bumped, slipped my footing a little and just knocked heads. Her original statement saying "the victim did not suffer any injury other than a small amount of pain." I am a well sized, fit guy, if I were to intentionally headbutt someone, which I never would, the outcome would've been alot worse.

Also after I left her place that night, it was her new boyfriend who called the cops, who enforced the avo, and are now pressing the charges.

I say the whole councillor issue so I don't get any "love sick, get over it" responses, which I have received from others.
I suggest that good legal representation would deal with the jealous ex boyfriend relatively easily. How the boyfriend can make the complaint is also of interest. Was the complainant made by the ex girlfriend to police and she would have had to declare that you head butted her so is that on her signed complaint? Who is the PINOP?

The counsellor will let you talk through events on your mind so it may be useful in that regard as you can get down on paper the exact event.
InDistress said
Her original statement saying "the victim did not suffer any injury other than a small amount of pain." I am a well sized, fit guy, if I were to intentionally head butt someone, which I never would, the outcome would've been alot worse.
I am confused. The boyfriend made the complaint to the police who issued an AVO; yet she says she did not suffer any injury other than a small amount of pain…Why did she not say that NO he did not head butt me we were talking and our heads were next to each other and no there was no injury? and my jealous boyfriend has fabricated all of this and that you did not enter her house uninvited?

There is one huge problem in all of this and your ex girlfriend seems to be telling porkies to the police. The police would not issue an interim AVO without her complaint.
InDistress said
Also after I left her place that night, it was her new boyfriend who called the cops, who enforced the avo, and are now pressing the charges
Does this mean you had a previous avo? They "ENFORCED" the avo? What avo? How can they enforce an AVO as you don't have one yet.. you have an interim avo after this incident or did you have one before that was actually an AVO not an interim avo.

Lucky for you that the currently proposed definition of family violence is not operational.

I would not be "loosely" dealing with legal representation. I would be treating this fairly seriously as these things can really escalate at court and you could end up with a custodial sentence. Breaking and Entering and Assault has an extremely bad look and a Magistrate is not going to have any sense of humour in relation to police bringing these charges to account. The police must have grounds or this would not be up in the first instance.

Executive Secretary - Shared Parenting Council of Australia
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Do you have children together? You've been separated for 3 years. Is this a family law matter?



4MYDAUGHTER
No, this is her new boyfriend, who was with her when she arrived home to find me there. The new boyfriend made the complaint to the police by making the first call to them. The PINOP is my ex girlfriend, the fact sheet states that "the accused then lent in to the victim and headbutted her".

I do not know, originally I believed it was her boyfriend pressuring her into doing all of this, but as the AVO is in place, I have no way of contacting her to find out.

Yes, sorry it is an interim AVO. I have never had an AVO against me, or any criminal history in the past.

I don't believe the assault will go well in court, a friend police officer told me that they have to prove you intentionally tried to hurt her, which comes back to the "small amount of pain" etc.

The break and enter isn't looking good. 3 charges on the matter "break and enter with intent to commit serious indictable offence, steal." And "break and enter and commit serious indictable offence, steal, to wit, one can of red drink" And also "intentionally or recklessly destroy/damage property, to wit, gyprock wall and window of property."

Also her neighbours "witnessed the whole thing: saying they saw me go through the whole house turning lights on and off, unlock her car but not gain access to it, steal one can of drink, and attack the new boyfriends car", which I have no idea what it is. Only her car was in her driveway at the time. In the original statement "a neighbour approached asking who owns the white ute, there may be damage to it. The (new boyfriend) inspected but found no damage." Now I am also being charged with "intentionally or recklessly destroy/damage property, to wit, passenger window white ute." Being there 5 nights a week for the past year when we were together, when the house is empty the blinds are down, And neighbours from any angle can actually only see in her kitchen window, besides the front end of the house where if the blinds were up you could see into the living room alone, the rest of the house is surrounded. And I am also asking the question, if the neighbours noticed suspicious activity why did they not call the police immediately? And how could they identify me at 3am from their window, across the road into her window ?

With the whole "break and enter with intent to commit serious indictable offence therein, to wit, steal." If I was going to steal, would I not have just got what I could and just run away. I was in her car port when they arrived home, after waiting a while, and I did not have any of her property at all.

In her statement she defined us a living defacto for 2 years. She has children, which are not mine, but after being with her for that long I also fell in love with her kids, and not seeing them has also been heartbreaking. We've been separated for 3-4 months now, this incident occured on the 27th Dec 2010.
InDistress said
The new boyfriend made the complaint to the police by making the first call to them. The PINOP is my ex girlfriend, the fact sheet states that "the accused then lent in to the victim and headbutted her".
She must fear for her safety and thing you are a violent person or she would not have signed off on this. She must, MOST CERTAINLY, have convinced a serving police officer who wrote up the complaint that you were threatening , stalking or otherwise harassing her.

What on earth possessed you to wait in the carport in the early hours of the morning (At 3am) for her to come home when you were not a resident there. Its a wonder they have not added further charges in relation to loitering. Surely you would have expected her to come home with a friend and there could have been an altercation.
InDistress said
I don't believe the assault will go well in court, a friend police officer told me that they have to prove you intentionally tried to hurt her, which comes back to the "small amount of pain" etc.
There are two components required to be proven. Common Assault has two elements…
1. Actus reus  (guilty act)- physical contact or threat of immediate harm
AND
2. Reus (The intention). - Intentionally or recklessly. The intention to effect an unlawful contact, or to create an apprehension of imminent unlawful contact in the mind of the other person. DEFENCES AND LAWFUL ASSAULTS include Accidental use of physical force.

You actually did physically assault (Which is proven easily and I assume CCTV possibly) and that you intended to do it, or that you were of a mind to do it… (which is not yet proven) so there is some scope for a defence there.
InDistress said
… "intentionally or recklessly destroy/damage property, to wit, gyprock wall and window of property."
If you did not damage the gyprock wall and the window are you suggesting there was a break in prior to you getting there at whatever time of the morning that was?
InDistress said
In her statement she defined us a living defacto for 2 years. She has children, which are not mine, but after being with her for that long I also fell in love with her kids, and not seeing them has also been heartbreaking. We've been separated for 3-4 months now…
You should consider lodging an application for some mediation at a Family Relationship Centre to see what can be done. In relation to the rest you will should consider a good Barrister who can argue on his feet, not a solicitor, and probably someone well known at the court you are attending.


Executive Secretary - Shared Parenting Council of Australia
 Was my post helpful? If so, please let others know about the FamilyLawWebGuide whenever you see the opportunity
 
Just an update; I breached the interim AVO and have now had "breach bail" and "breach avo" added. The assault has been dropped and replaced with "stalk and intimidate".

So now I am facing; Break and enter with intent to steal <$60,000,
Stalk and intimidate,
Cause damage to property <$2000,
Cause damage to property <$2000,
Breach ADVO,
Breach bail.

The breach of bail happened one night I had was feeling depressed and attempted to overdose and sent her a goodbye message.

2 days later I went to hospital and was checked out fine, saw a psychiatrist at the hospital and everything was fine. The next week I was back in my hometown where the original incident took place for court, and after a few days in town the local police arrested me for the breach of avo, was refused bail by the Sergeant and faced court the next morning. While in custody I was seen by a court appointed health worker, who informed me of a Section 32 under the mental health act, where no conviction is made for any charge, on the basis of a temporary mental condition at the time of the incident.

I was released on bail from the court, but the avo was enforced for 12 months. After, I immediately left town.

Part of the Sect 32 is going on a mental health plan for 6 months so have seen a GP to get that set up. I have a meeting with the court health worker tomorrow, before court next Tuesday where we find out if the Sect 32 will be accepted, if not, I enter pleas.
Were you in the house at any time during this? Did you smash the window or gyprock? Did you confront the boyfriend/ex girlfriend when they come home? The story just feels as though it is missing a few key facts to return an honest opinion or assistance..  I suggest building a support network up around you to help out, but can almost guarantee even with good legal help you are going to be found guilty of some of the above, and in most cases this won't amount to much more than an extention of the AVO and fine for first offence in most cases.
   I have been through a similar matter but for assaulting a non quitting bullying and threatening ex brother in law who I had placed an AVO on previously. There will be a blemish on your record as there now is, but will carry no real weight in later life. In a lot of cases, down the track when it comes up through an application for a gov job etc, you can plead your case and show a good record before and after…
 DON'T let this rule your life, don't let it hold you back. The most important thing is to know that life is what you make it, the lows are followed by highs. The time will go quick, the AVO will disappear, and new opportunities present themselves.
The story seems to be laid out in the first few posts in this topic. You make some good commentary LearningHardWay. Take the medicine on the chin and move on to a new relationship. It seems to me there might be some discussion around depression and some mental illness that might mitigate matters on the hearing day. I think some legal representation would not go astray here as there seem to be some mitigating circumstances that need to be eloquently put to a local Magistrate.

Executive Secretary - Shared Parenting Council of Australia
 Was my post helpful? If so, please let others know about the FamilyLawWebGuide whenever you see the opportunity
 
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