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4 Kalimna

Guest said
My intention is not to exclude the girlfriend (of 18months - yeah sounds like a steady relationship - but there is background I am not willing to divulge in a public forum)from our daughters life, however I have not once had her approach me or enter into a conversation with me in relation to the matter and the request is being pushed only by our daughters father which makes me concerned that this is not even something that the girlfriend is pursuing for the right reasons, but rather because she is being forced to nod her head to appease this man.

I have made suggestions such as that she would be welcome to meet me on weekends when I do travel the 300kms to the other town and spend a weekend there with family. I have suggested that she would be welcome to have play dates or even sleep overs withour daughter, IFour daughter was not distressed by the suggestion - which I would be supportive of. But that I only wish for this to happen if I am staying in the town over night. Because legally she has no guardianship rights and should anything happen which needed my consent such as medical care etc, then I would want to be close enough to get there in a hurry. The same goes if there was an emergency involving the GF. I would want to be able to get to our daughter quickly.
Kalimna, I didn't read anywhere in here where guest said she was the
only one who can love and care for a child
northat
when the child is with someone else supervision by them is necessary

Last edit: by MikeT


God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.
Larissap when someone writes - I have suggested that she would be welcome to have play dates or even sleepovers with our daughter - That the person is suggesting time in their environment. Therefore I consider this supervised time unless the girlfriend is to be left alone in someone elses property. The wording is not suggestive of the child leaving the mother, especially when the post is about the mother not wanting to allow child with girlfriend.
Hi Kalimna

It seems that you have intepreted it differently than I have (and I would respectfully suggest that many others would intepret it the same way as me on reading all the posts!).  I certainly didn't think that guest meant that sleepovers meant that the gf would sleepover with the mother and daughter (while the mother is herself sleeping over at family), nor the daughter and mother sleepingover at the girlfriends!  Having read all the information it is clear that the mother (guest) and girlfriend do not talk, that the mother visits the area infrequently and when she does she stays with her family. 

Guest said
Because legally she has no guardianship rights and should anything happen which needed my consent such as medical care etc, then I would want to be close enough to get there in a hurry. The same goes if there was an emergency involving the GF. I would want to be able to get to our daughter quickly.
  I also interpret this statement to mean that the mother is not with the daughter and gf but that if something were to happen while the gf had the daughter in her care without the mother,  the mother would be able to 'get there' or 'get to her daughter'. I am not sure how it could be interpreted any other way actually! :)

Maybe Kalimna like many of us (and I include myself here so that I am not discriminating) you (we) read what we want to read in posts and intepret them based on our own difficult experiences. Unfortunately that means that often the OP is blasted for something that they in fact are not doing.

L

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.
Larissap, maybe a post from the origional poster is needed to determine what the intentions are. Supervised or not as we see the same post in different views.
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