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View topic: Relocation and Validity of Old Consent Orders not being followed. – Family Law Web Guide
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Relocation and Validity of Old Consent Orders not being followed.

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Section1;}–>There are Consent Orders in place but they have not been followed properly for about 5 years.

A resides 1.5 hours flight away from B and child, works long hours, goes overseas for business a lot, has a lot of money, sees the child around every 3rd weekend and about 1/3 of school holidays.

B is not currently working, has relocated several times attempting to find a mutually agreeable compromise with A in terms of location of residence and school choice, is not financially independent due to lack of social support, has post-graduate level education and allied health professional registration and has been the primary caregiver for the childs whole life so far (12 years).

B wants to relocate to be near parents in order to be able to become financially independent and to put child into a friendlier school. This will mean child will be 4 hours flight from A but schooling will be significantly cheaper, resulting in an over-all financial saving to A but longer travelling times for child.

Child is currently very unhappy at school of As choice. Child wants to live with B near grand-parents and attend school of Bs choice.

Question  :$ :

1. Do the old Consent Orders have any validity considering they've not been followed for 5 years?
2. Can B just relocate safe in the knowledge that A has the money to be able to relocate to be near child if A so chooses?
3. Do the wishes of a 12.5 year old have any bearing on whether A might be advised that legal action to prevent relocation might be successful?

Last edit: by Secretary SPCA

If B makes a unilateral decision to relocate, then B needs to be aware that A is able to have this matter taken to court, and decided by a judicial officer, who may order B to return to previous location, or could even order the child to live with A, if B still intends to relocate.

There is no certainty in family law. The only things certain in life are death and taxes.

Why should A have to relocate when it is B who is wishing to relocate? Consider the other alternative. If A were going to relocate, how would B feel if A insisted that B relocate either to keep the 1.5hrs plane travel distance, or to a location even closer to A.

And how is 4 hrs travel going to be better for a child than 1.5hrs? Is B going to offer to pay the difference in the airfares for both trips?

What concessions or incentives is B going to offer in order to be able to move to another location without any objection being raised. 3 hours of travel on a weekend (every 3rd) is not so bad, but how is 8 hours of travel going to be better?
But by the time A gets the court to act there'll be a new status quo.  Ironically, the 'trick' A used against B when the marriage first broke up.  B wanted to sit down and work out a mutually possible arrangement that was the best outcome for the child, but A responded by running off with the child and filing an application for B to only have supervised contact, claiming that B was mentally unstable.  A dragged child and B through 4 years of court hearings in order to attempt to bleed B dry.  On the day of the final hearing A dropped the case because A knew that a court would give A a thrashing if A were to take the antics of the last 4 years before a judge.
Taxes are not necessary if one is prevented from being able to work by having one's freedom of movement stolen.
A does not HAVE to relocate but does have the financial capacity to do so if A so chooses.  A has already insisted, for the last 10 years, that B not live where B wishes to live.  4 hrs is not going to be better for the child other than perhaps if it reduces the frequency of disturbances to child's routine.  A already pays for schooling and airfares.  The total of the costs of these in the current location are less than the total of the costs of these in the new location (the new school is that much cheaper).
It would not be bad for the child to spend less time with the parent that feeds it junk food and plonks it in front of computer games and tv in a city apartment the whole time it is there - A.
A should not count on status quo as an argument. There are cases that are now going against status quo. And also, recovery orders can be held as an urgent hearing, so there is not the usual time delay within the system, and therefore there would not necessarily be time to build status quo as such.

As for saying that taxes are not necessary, people in Australia no matter what their location work and pay taxes. I don't think being unable to relocate is really a substantial argument. After all, it would appear that B has relocated more than once since seperation. And B has had some say in where B resides. (stated as mutally agreed compromise).

You said that the costs in the current location are cheaper than the new proposed location even though the schooling is cheaper. How is that an argument towards B moving?

And you have also stated that the child will be spending less time with A, still a negative argument.

Obviously A resides in a city. Is the new proposed location a city as well? In in event, that A did move to the same location as B, is B then going to offer a 50/50 shared care arrangement. Or will be B still offer the every third weekend, and 1/3 of holidays, which doesn't equate to the "norm" of every second weekend, and half of all school holidays?

And given that A pays school fees and airfares already, will the school fees then become a shared expense, because B will have financial independance and therefore a capacity to pay?
If you're forced to live where you can't get work or you can't keep it due to having no social support, then you do not pay taxes.  If you can't afford a car and you can't afford to buy your own home….ditto.  I guess the only tax one pays in this case is GST.  But if you buy largely local produce and make most things yourself, you pay very little of this too.
B has to keep relocating because nowhere suits B…because B has to compromise on essential points constantly.
The Family Court needs to make orders in the best interests of the child, so if A is making the child obese, then perhaps less time with A is in order.  Yes, A resides in a filthy city full of people who are happy to put morality aside for the sake of cash.  
Costs in new location are cheaper than current….sorry…my mistake….being interrupted mid-typing.
Once B is earning enough money, B can contribute as B desires to - equally.  This situation is all about control (via wealth and willingness to place morality below law) and its about to be OVER.
10 years of one's life is enough to sacrifice to a spoilt brat of an ex.

To quote Maid Marian "The Family Court needs to make orders in the best interests of the child, so if A is making the child obese, then perhaps less time with A is in order.  Yes, A resides in a filthy city full of people who are happy to put morality aside for the sake of cash."

Ok, what you have posted here and on another thread, explains quite a lot. I think there are other issues at play here, and now have a different perspective on things.

You see, I have difficulty coming to terms with it being the fault of the spends time with parent for making the child obese, after all the child is with that parent for less than 20% of the time (every third w/end and 1/3 school hols) so I think that in situations like this the 80% of time spent with a parent who has the child's diet under "control" would compensate for any dietary indiscretions.

And as for the comments about the city being filthy where people put aside morality for cash, well that really says a lot about your perception of the "outside" world. That and the fact that B has to keep on relocating because nowhere suits B indicates that B has some issues.

As for not being able to work because of lack of social support. There are plenty of people out there who don't have family and friends near them to be able to offer assistance, and yet they continue to work and raise children.

I personally think that there are a lot of other issues here on the part of B, and that they need to be addressed by a professional outside of the family court situation.
I understand that you don't have all the facts so I will forgive you.
I seriously can't be bothered running through everything on a forum like this either…I WAS hoping there'd be people here who could help my child, by helping us to avoid the conflict of a court case.
No problem Boots, I'll just get a job as a check-out chick in coles despite the fact that I have a post-grad level of education and the HECS debt to go with it.  I'll continue to rent a decrepit home in an unsafe neighbourhood because I can't afford anything better and I'll continue to not have any property, savings or even any superannuation just so my ex can have the luxury of being able to fill my child full of junk food on a regular basis and sit back in the location of his choice while I am not free to take a decent job….OR I could just run away!!!
When a child goes on a 3 week holiday with the other parent and comes back 6 kg heavier (and no taller), there's something seriously wrong.  When EVERY weekend the child visits the other parent the child returns a kilo or two heavier, there's something wrong!  The other parent is obese, I am not.
Yes, there are lots of other issues.  I don't like the way our society has become.  I have conservative, family values and there is nowhere I am allowed to live where these are the norm and where I am not exposed to flouridated water, smog and high crime levels.  Why do I have to be subjected to moral decadence all around me?  Where are MY freedoms and rights?
It is not a sign of sanity to be well-adjusted to a profoundly sick society!
Is this for real?

The husband hired a prostitute to do business in "the Spare Room" while wife and child were in another room caused the end of the relationship and first words were lets sit down and talk about what's best for the child????

"When a child goes on a 3 week holiday with the other parent and comes back 6 kg heavier (and no taller), there's something seriously wrong.  When EVERY weekend the child visits the other parent the child returns a kilo or two heavier, there's something wrong!  The other parent is obese, I am not."

"No problem Boots, I'll just get a job as a check-out chick in coles despite the fact that I have a post-grad level of education and the HECS debt to go with it.  I'll continue to rent a decrepit home in an unsafe neighbourhood because I can't afford anything better and I'll continue to not have any property, savings or even any superannuation just so my ex can have the luxury of being able to fill my child full of junk food on a regular basis and sit back in the location of his choice while I am not free to take a decent job….OR I could just run away!!!"

If this is all true and correct i would seriously suggest some counselling as you would need to live in a bubble in the desert.

I fear this is just someone playing games to either  seek sympathy or make the site seem a group of women haters.

You can fool some of the people some of the time but you cant fool all of the people all of  the time unless they work for CSA and youre a Payee:)
You like to assume things.  Would you like a day by day account of things or can you simply accept the key details?
Day 1: wife finds strange charges on credit card statement
…several weeks later this is repeated after another interstate business trip….
Wife asks about charges (simply because SHE does the household accounting) and is given a strange answer.  Wife investigates and makes awful discovery.  Wife asks husband and husband admits.  Wife declares this to be unacceptable and a 'fatal flaw' in marriage.  Husband agrees not to do it again then tries to buy wife's forgiveness with expensive dinner, shopping trip etc.  Wife is not impressed and doesn't want sex.  Husband gets angry and gets prostitute.  Wife visits her best friend to help her sort through feelings and makes hard decision.  Several conversations have ensued since this time….the next meaningful and related conversation was the one in which the wife advises husband of fact that she can't accept this life and THEN the next words out of her mouth are…..
Are you telling me that there is nowhere that I can live safely in an harmonious community in Australia?  
I often see jobs advertised for my profession in remote locations but, as there are no direct flights to the father's location and/or the duration of the flights is too long as you so kindly pointed out in previous posts, these are not available to me.  
How would my story make the site seem something????  I don't want sympathy.  I want my life back.  I want the Family Legal System to acknowledge that there are a myriad of unique circumstances in EVERY break-up - that there can be no 'mandatory' requirements because the more you legislate, the more you deprive people of freedoms.  If this Nation restored its fundamental social values as taking primacy over the making of money then we'd have far less of these issues.
Even the !Kung in the Kalahari and the Yanamomo Indians know this!!!!!!!!!
Maid Marion said
If this Nation restored its fundamental social values as taking primacy over the making of money then we'd have far less of these issues.

Although my opinion is along these lines I don't believe that it's as simple to do as you imply. However, I do understand that you have post graduate education, therefore I'd appreciate you explaining how you would go about making such changes. I also believe that you are mistaken if introducing these changes that you are wishing will have any real impact upon the situation that you describe. I believe that retrospective legislation is not something that can happen. However, considering your education I would expect that you have considered this aspect and have some sort of remedy to cope. Could you please enlighten myself and other users. Also exactly what are the fundamental values that you speak about, as their definition would be fundamental to the consideration of whether or not what you propose is acceptable in people's opinions? Certainly I don't consider much societal value in saying to people that I have an idea it's the same as this documented idea, you go find out what my ideas that I am proposing are. I believe the person or people really willing to be part of society would state these are my ideas that I propose … they are similar to/fashioned upon  ….
I can understand your situation completely but I urge you to have a very clear reason for court and how it will benefit the child. I tried to relocate one hour away from the father four years ago with very similar reasons and was refused. I am now under a court order preventing me from moving from where Dad lives. It is awful and I can understand where you are coming from. I am miserable and my son is not benefiting from this arrangement as the father is abusive and some weekends not even there (he is cared for by his stepmother). I am currently again before the court as I have re-married and have more children to my husband who has been posted with the military to Brisbane to which my ex is opposing. There is a real possibility that I will not be allowed to relocate with my husband and that I will have to keep the 'status quo' here with three children and live 1000km away from my husband and maintain two households with my husband only seeing his young children every now and then.
Trust me, relocation is very difficult and the it seems to matter little what the other party does you may not be able to move. I have had to give up my freedom of movement for four years and it is horrible. This is apparently unimportant as child seeing father is paramount. Even if they are substandard parents the court will uphold this. Good luck from someone who has been throughit and is about to again.
Maid_Marian said
When a child goes on a 3 week holiday with the other parent and comes back 6 kg heavier (and no taller), there's something seriously wrong.  When EVERY weekend the child visits the other parent the child returns a kilo or two heavier, there's something wrong!
I'm sorry, but I think it has to be said that when a parent weighs a child and makes note of how many kilos have been gained after every visit with the other parent, THEN there's something seriously wrong! Particularly amounts as minor as 1-2 kg. Do you realise that an individual's weight can fluctuate anywhere between 1-5kg any given day - or every day - depending on metabolism, water retention, the kinds of foods consumed, toileting, etc? Your child's "weight gain" after a visit with dad sounds within a healthy fluctuation range. If you tell us that your child's weight doesn't vary so much whilst living with you, then I'd be even more concerned, because that means you're putting your child on the scales even more frequently! Those are the kinds of actions that cause eating disorders and self esteem issues. How must your child feel when it's time to get on the scales and let mum see how much weight you've gained this time? That in itself could directly affect your child's eating habits. If a kid realises they are not as slim as they are expected to be, this affects their self esteem. If they have already learned to find comfort in food, there is a perfect trigger for overeating to self medicate.

If you feed your child well, teach them to appreciate good foods and why their body needs them, and teach them to limit junk to now and again, then realistically, the small infrequent amount of time your child spends with the other parent should have little bearing on their overall health and weight. If, as you say, Dad simply sticks them in a room with junk food, then your positive influence for the majority of the time should far outweigh any lack of education or attention on his part. And if your child truly is putting on small amounts of weight with each visit, then this should be a temporary issue, considering how little time is spent with Dad. Such small amounts are easily dropped off with a continued healthy lifestyle. I think making a fuss about it and weighing your child upon their return is far more potentially damaging than a few days of junk food with Dad here and there.

Where are MY freedoms and rights?
I can tell you where they are not - within the Family Court. If this winds up in court the only right that will be considered is that of the child  - to have a meaningful relationship with both parents. I acknowledge that it must suck for you, but many of the issues you are raising here would not do you any justice if raised in court. 

In answer to the original question

If "B" did unilaterally relocate, "A" could certainly seek to have the original orders enforced, at least the relevant clauses. The time scale to get the matter into court could be hours or days, certainly not weeks. The most likely path is a contravention which generally results in a first mention 2 weeks after application with the strong possibility of a hearing the same day or within days depending on arguments made with the application.

in the end the court would make it's decision on the merits of the case which could mean "B" would have to return or may be allowed to stay in the new location.

The new arrangements that have developed over time could become the new orders.

The views of a child 12 1/2 would certainly be given considerable weight by the court, subject to the court being reasonably sure they were the child's views.

If a parent wishing to relocate wished to argue social isolation then they would need to be able to show they lived in Isolated community with no real prospects of viable employment.

On the issue of schooling they would need to be able to show that the new school offers advantages for the child over the existing school, especially where that is a private school.

For me - Shared Parenting is a Reality - Maybe it can be for you too!
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