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Where do I stand Re: schools/Kinders next week

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From everyone's comments/suggestions/advice, I'm thinking I won't be able to get back to the court so easily, so I am wondering where I stand now.

In the orders it states for this year we must do all things necessary to agree on a mutually agreed school.  Where do I stand if the ex refuses to discuss it and his only input is to put in petty little points on school such as it is with 2km radius of his home, and I have presented over 15 schools within 30mins of his home, that are at a good level academically (unlike the ones he is choosing).

Where do I stand when no agreement is made and he refuses to communicate?

Can they stay at the school alreading attending and kinder that was already applied for before the case?

It's only a week til school starts so I have told him it has become paramount that we agree but with no response, what rights and avenues do I have for this situation?

That's if anyone knows LOL

Thanks In Advance

How far away do you live from eachother? Is the 2km close to you as well?

They must find it difficult, those who have taken authority as the truth, rather than truth as the authority

No, it is not close to myself it is about 30kms from us and 8kms from his home.
This is very difficult when one parent will not participate. You can legislate all you like but if a parent doesn't wish to partake then someone has to make a decision.

The factors are not just km but also how long does it take for both parents to get there and participate. You can be 10km away in Sydney and take 2 hours to get there. My view is to try and get a school that will give you the programmes that you need for the children, is a school that welcomes parent participation and is relatively evenly placed between the parents. Obviously common-sense has to prevail and there is a lot of parent activity that goes on in schools today. If the father works, how far away is his work from school and can he participate at events during the day. His employer and yours may be a factor in determining the school location. If you or he are dropping off or picking up while the kids are younger until they get buses is that going to work and are bus routes out in both directions when they do get buses later on?

Failing agreement have you anyone who can help mediate a decision which must be made as a matter of urgency now. If there is no agreement the logical situation is to leave them where they are. I think you suggested he is 30km away from you and the proposed school, is 8km away from his home.

Executive Secretary - Shared Parenting Council of Australia
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Hi faith in my state you have little choice but to send the children to the school of your district unless they are privately educated.

When you register the child an address must be given that you reside in.

If this is the same in your state and you are registering the children for school how many schools are you limited to ???

If this is the same for your state and the childrens father wants them to remain at the previous school will he then need to register them ???

As the children are 5 & 7 ( I think ) they will assimilate into a new school but friends are important at any age.

Although I understand the need to relocate I do believe it puts you in a higher responsibility to ensure the kids remain as consistent as possible regarding travel to school.

A long journey from either house in shared care can cause problems at school.

Perhaps relocating closer to their current school may be an option in the future, I noticed that you have suggested schools that are generally 30 minutes away from him yet the children are only 5 minutes away from him at last years school there's not much intensive for him to change. The validity of the academic value could be argued on the point it was good enough last year and the distance with regards it was you who chose to move.

I understand you want change but be careful it is not used against you. there is much that will be considered and you need to prepare yourself to be ready for any argument by providing considerate solutions.   
Thanks for your replies.

I might not have explained myself well, got to late for things to be kicking in properly.

When we originally went to court he demanded the change on the grounds he is not Anglican, yet had agreed to it the previous years of school. The childrens lawyer added it in the orders that we agree on a change of school. I would be happy for them to stay at current school but ex is not. I had even offered a school that was within equal distance to us, it was still a religous school but non denomenational. They provide a bus service from both locations but the ex stated we would only go for a school close to him.

Moving us is not an option, when we lost the case to relocate and had to sell our house where we were going to move to we had to go for the area we could afford, now with another baby on the way, we could never afford a home of the size that we need down near him.

Parent participation is not a factor for him, all year I attended all special events and parent participation even with te distance from me because "his work was more important" and he did state this. The ex has changed jobs recently or is unemployed as his employer closed down a few months ago so I have no idea on distance from work but for me it is still 30km from my work as my partner and I are both self employed at home, it was a lifestyle change we made for the children when the orders were put in.

Mediatian has been tried, one of the topics for mediation that I got the two certificates from was about the schools. one place said our views were to opposite and the other felt he was to intimidating.

I know what you mean about districts D4E I have been through that when I was achild but no we don't have that where I am.

Does that explain it a little more? sorry it is thoroughly complicated.


It explains a lot more faith.

Is one of the problems his ability to pay for private schooling ??.

Personally I think I would go for the school that is half way that has a bus pick-up if fee's are not a problem, falling back on the fact that it would be in the best interests of the child to be the same distance from both homes and that you took into consideration transportation factors.

I understand the situation due to the failed relocation which you no doubt have kicked yourself in the but about in hindsight.

I guess the distance to consider is the distance between the homes and not work, after all in most cases children go home after school and if transport is provided by the school this time can be used to be at home for the children.

I've read your other posts and realise this has not gone the way you had wished and you do need clarification on some points regarding orders but some of the things you will just have to work around and make the best of as with many of us there are things that are totally frustrating but not worth the fight and others that need to be fought for so it will pay to let a few of the irritating smaller things go to establish credibility on the bigger issues.

Best example that can be offered is medical appointments, make them in your time if the X is unreliable but send a very strong letter ( as proof ) if he fails to administer medication as prescribed by the specialist. It's not your responsibility to insure their father a responsible parent but you will consider it your responsibility to ensure appointments are met. If you can see what I mean. It's a fight none of us win.

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