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I have been recently told by my lawyer that my daughter could be taken from my home and returned to the state she was born if her father wishes this so and that I should be thankful to him for allowing me to have our daughter for as long as which he has, I with my daughter live in both of our home state and have been here for 10 months now.

According to my lawyer he can have her removed from my care and returned to the state he lives in which he would gain full custody? Her father gave us promission to leave the state at no time did I just take her without his consent. Nothing was put in writting thou?

Is this correct and after 10 months of live here can he still do this and what are my rights as a mother? According to my lawyer there are no rights as a mother anymore if he says he wants her once she's in school the courts look fondly upon this as him finally stepping up to the role of father and will grant him custody. Which he has mentioned he will do he's just not ready to deal with fatherhood yet.
Would need more details for anyone to contribute, but make sure you don't post anything to identifying to your unique circumstances.

On face value of what you have posted my first question would be does your lawyer have much family law experience?

Is the father arguing that you made a unilateral decision to relocate?

Executive Member of SRL-Resources, the Family Law People on the site (Look for the Avatars).   Be mindful what you post in the public areas
Thank you for replying Liberi,
My Lawyer has had 25 years experiance in family law and extensive knowledge in court cases with children of my daughters age. Or so I have been lead to believe. My ex isn't arguing the relocation as he isn't interested in taking her until she is older. My Lawyer was trying to make a point to me that I should be thankful to him for letting me move interstateand that he's not that bad and she has seen worse but in doing so has made it very stressful for my husband and I as now we cant get a clear answer out of her as to if he's still able to do this? And as we aren't made of money and things are getting quite expensive now I'm afraid to see her again as I left the last time feeling like I actually seen my ex's lawyer and not the one that was so sure of herself on the first visit. Can he do this? And do we live in fear of the day he does? And how is emotions and attachment with and from my daughter to me and my husband and soon to be sibling taken into consideration? I have gone out of my way to provide a stable and safe environment with my ex included in her life at all times and has only ceased due to emotional anxiety problems she encounted by being separated from me over chirstmas and his failure to actknowedge this and making her worse. And only after months of asking him to come to the psychologists with me to arrange a new parenting plan with only our daughters feelings and well being taken into consideration. I'm so worried that at any moment he can have her taken.
Anabelle said
My Lawyer has had 25 years experiance in family law and extensive knowledge in court cases with children of my daughters age….. I'm afraid to see her again as I left the last time feeling like I actually seen my ex's lawyer and not the one that was so sure of herself on the first visit. 
  You are paying $380 plus an hour to have a solicitor who you feel this about! Get a second opinion and another solicitor! Your story seems a bit strange, why would your solicitor think a court would take a child from a stable home where it has been settled for 10 months and give it to a parent who has had limited contact in another state when that parent agreed to the relocation? What is the other parents reasoning for such a drastic unsettling change if it isn't you went without permission? He would have to have a pretty good story I would think.

Your rights

Anabelle, I had a female lawyer a few years ago that was so against my decisions to let my son live with his father, and my daughter live with me, that I paid her costs out just prior to going to court, and moved on to a much better family law specialist who had represented some of my friends. This was what my children wanted so I pursued it and it cost me double for not doing my homework before hand. This was financially difficult, as I was a sole parent and only working part time. Anyway, all worked out OK in the end as I had a great lawyer second time around. You are paying them to legally represent you and the lawyer that represents you should look at your and your child's circumstances to achieve the best outcomes for both of you while working within the Family Law framework.
Thanks Guys,
All she said was that I should be thankful to him for letting us leave and that if he wanted to he could have her removed from my care. As my ex is a controlling manipulator who mentally and emotionally abuse me to the point I would suffer panick attaks and depression, this was the last thing I wanted to hear. It put me in tears on the spot and I haven't slept properly since! We def had permission as on more then one occasion I was blamed for trapping him in father hood and screamed at that he didn't want her and he wasn't ready to be a father. There was a police witness to this and his permission as an AVO was taken out against him. but nothing in writting. I'm not too sure what her game is and since have gotten another opion and they have said what you guys have said that it would be a exteme case for them to remove her from a stable home. I'm a little more then upset to realise that we've now to pay 800 plus for not much of anything but misguided advice and possibly more to find another lawyer. Personally I think she believes me to be just another woman wanting to stop their ex from seeing the children. Which is far from the truth. And if the case I would have taken the 12 month AVO order that the police inisted I do. I only want whats best for my daughter and to lessen some of the stress caused by all of this for her so she doesn't grow up with anxiety problems before she's three. Thank you all for your advice it has helped quite a lot.
Hi Anabelle

I think some Lawyers feel that they need to do a "reality check" for some of their clients so they can say some really off-putting things. Has she communicated with your ex? If so, what was that like?

My ex was still quite abusive and manipulative in his communications to my lawyer. My lawyer (although his words to me were confronting considering everything my child and I had been through) is the written form to my ex would really stomp all over him. He would remain congenial so as to save any angst, however as soon as my ex hit below the belt, my lawyer would really stand up.

As Conan would say, when it comes to Lawyers, You get what you pay for. Remember, they are your Agent and if you're not happy, take your thousands elsewhere.
Anabelle said
And only after months of asking him to come to the psychologists with me to arrange a new parenting plan with only our daughters feelings and well being taken into consideration. I'm so worried that at any moment he can have her taken.

You reference your intention to arrange a 'new parenting'. Is there an existing parenting plan in effect? If so, when was the Parenting Plan executed? What does it specify about time arrangements between the father and daughter? And how old is your daughter?


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