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Coming up for final hearing...serious nerves

Good evening all,

I'm a SRL, coming up for final hearing in a few weeks came across this site. Wish I had a year ago. Feeling a little nervous.

The cliff notes on my circumstance.

Filed an application in a case for the 3 primary school aged children to reside with me in Jan.
Interim hearing in April, after a fair bit of leg work, had the children reside with me.
Mother to have day time contact on weekends 3 out of 4 & for 4 days during each school holidays.

Mother consistently failed to see children. Has seen them on 5 occasions in 8 months. Has not gained employment or started studies.

I work full time, care for the kids & am completing a grad degree.

On paper, I'm fairly confident orders will be maintained. Children have are in 3rd term here (over 200kms from where they were with the mother). Are doing well & have cousins, grandparents here (none of which they had with mother).

Essentially circumstances since interim have seen things for children & I improve, whilst seemingly not change, possibly decline for the Mother.

Just starting to get a little nervous. Waiting for family report, which was over $5k for my half. At the directions hearing FM recommended a solicitor, just don't have the means.

Thoughts?

Simplytryingdad

Sadly you will need to wait and hope the family report is written independently and without it being overwritten or overstating events and circumstances that relate to you and your ex?

A family report is a report that is required as part of the process that is within the Family law court rooms as it is used as a source of removing some of the decision making away from the FM. In my opinion no person is able to write an expert report in only one or two and three sessions on seeing a family, and then expect to write a family report that will be 100% accurate. Sadly yet, it is relied upon and often used. In some cases parties may fight and disagree, a second report is then ordered or usually one further report will be requested a year later to make a comparison.

Again in my opinion nothing more than good unnecessary money lost and wasted. A family report that is conducted over many months may be more reliable to the truth of events and circumstances identifying your family matter, and still expect some minor details that will be conflicting views and expressions that you will not be happy with when you will be reading the report. The law is one thing and your circumstances are something else.

Dont forget we are humans and we have feelings emotions that run high and when someone is in this position things are often overwhelming and this is when we become most vulnerable and exposed and become helpless while we will be relying on a stranger who choice of words and sentences is almost a language of their own and what the write will be overwhelming, being that it is based on the law?

No FM, no expert report writer, no independent children solicitor can or usually get it right as they have no magic powers they are also human beings and they also have feelings the difference is that when $$$$$$$$$$$$ fall into decision making they too often get it wrong.

The only people who can get it right are those who are "you and me" who lived the event who had and know their firsthand experience of not having a compatible and logical partner in the first instance and thereafter find themselves here in this position before the courts.

Even though FM dont like too many changes in children's circumstances the law states equal shared parenting, so a decision can change everything and turn what is otherwise normal into chaos.

Sadly I do not know your history and details of your matter but I can share one thing with you, you must always remain humble and truthful and keep on doing what is in your children's' best interest as far as welfare LOVE stability and security goes and you cannot go wrong.

Whatever you are faced with passed and present, whatever the courts throw at you, you should only worry for one split second and then as always try to remain humble with a simple smile and with all honesty approach and deal with it appropriately by researching and getting several opinions and professional unpaid advice.

Hope this makes sense to you and is of some help? Never give up and fight for the truth and your children Safety and welfare. The Family law overwrites common sense and logics and is too often wrong, destroying children and good families.

Good luck!

Family Report is in

Thanks St George.

Having received & reviewed the family report feeling like a huge weight has been taken off my shoulders.

Clear recommendations the children should reside primarily with the father…Wow.

After a long hard road, it feels like, honesty, integrity & dedication to my children & life will be realised.

I still have some doubt.

Although copious amounts of objective evidence appear to strongly stack in my children's favour, with (to me & some others) the best thing being they reside with me.

I shall update on the final outcome & will be happy to share thoughts & or advice in the resources area if I can get access.

Regards,

Simplytryingdad…
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